Rome, Italy
The Eternal Traffic Jam
"Three Thousand Years of Style Over Punctuality"
Official Coat of Arms
A shield bearing a she-wolf gridlocked at a zebra crossing, flanked by a Vespa mid-overtake and a fountain into which several tourists have thrown coins they can't afford to lose. Above, a scaffolding-clad monument motto reads 'Restoration Ongoing Since 1980.'
TripAdvisor Review
★★★★☆ 4/5
"Absolutely stunning ruins, but I lost my rental car deposit navigating the Colosseum roundabout at rush hour - I've seen chariot races with more discipline. Every meal was extraordinary but service happens on 'Roman time,' which apparently means whenever the waiter feels spiritually ready. Also please explain why a metro line takes 15 years to build when the Pantheon went up while everyone was still using togas. Still, watching the sunset over the Forum with a €2 espresso almost made the pickpocket incident worth it."— Gary Pemberton, Solihull
Property Listing
Charming multi-millennia property with unbeatable historical character, original 2,000-year-old features throughout, and a walkable neighbourhood (once you accept walking is your only realistic transport option). Some cosmetic scaffolding present, timeless views, and neighbours who've technically been dead since the Empire but still show up in the piazza at dusk.
Twinned With
Los Angeles — Both cities worship ancient glory, have catastrophic traffic, and think everyone else should be grateful just to look at them.
Supporting Evidence
Rome has been under some form of archaeological excavation or restoration continuously for so long that locals joke the city's official state is 'transennato' (fenced off).