Ponty-Probably-Closed

Official Coat of Arms

The shield displays a golden shopping trolley rampant on a field of faded 'To Let' signs, supported by two rampant charity shop mannequins. Above sits a crown bearing the sacred Wetherspoons logo, while below flows a banner reading 'Per Aspera Ad Retail Park' - through hardship to out-of-town shopping.

TripAdvisor Review

★★★☆☆ 3/5

"Visited Pontypridd hoping to see the famous Old Bridge, which is admittedly lovely. However, the town centre feels like a retail graveyard - half the shops are boarded up and the other half seem to be charity shops or vape stores. The Lido leisure centre looks impressive from outside though, and at least there's a decent Wetherspoons if you need somewhere warm to contemplate your life choices."

Property Listing

Charming historic market town with abundant retail opportunities (translation: lots of empty shops you could rent cheaply). Excellent transport links to Cardiff mean you can easily escape - sorry, commute - to the capital. The famous Old Bridge provides a picturesque backdrop for contemplating whether to move somewhere with actual functioning shops.

Twinned With

Any American rust belt town, because they both know what it's like to watch their high streets slowly die while politicians promise regeneration that never quite materializes.

Supporting Evidence

Pontypridd's town centre has so many empty shops that the council has started putting up fake shop fronts with cheerful window displays to make the place look less depressing - a retail therapy placebo effect.